Medi didn’t really hate Burjwok’s laughter, she just wondered how one could be so happy. Burjwok laughed whenever she pleased. She’d both say the joke, and act as an audience, and as much as Medi tried, she couldn’t match Burjwok’s unbothered mood. But Medi loved Burjwok, for she was the only one who was able to console her without judgment.

It was now a warm, summer day in early June, and Juba’s weather was pushy. An excuse Medi could use to explain the urge she was feeling to leave the house. She called Burjwok.

“Let’s go out,” she said.

“What’s happening?” said Burjwok, sounding concerned, “Feeling anxious?”

“No. I’m just bored,” she lied.

“Cool, let’s meet at the park, and then we’ll see.”

When they found each other, they occupied a bench under the tree, sucking straws on icy juice and gazing at the park visitors. Burjwok was wearing her favorite blue dress and a matching pair of glasses.

“Do you ever think about pain?” she asked.

Medi kept staring around, unsurprised. For if they shared something in common, it would be their ability to come up with random topics of discussion.

“What pain?” said Medi.

“Emotional pain. Sadness, heartbreak, disappointment, fear…,” she paused, “I call it E-pain.” Medi looked at Burjwok, as they chuckled.

“I do,” said Medi. “You think it’s different from the physical one?”

“They’re almost the same. The only difference is, one is less attended to. But they can both kill you.”

Medi looked at her juice, “I’d say it comes in some sort of measurement unit. It’s like energy…or weight. We don’t all feel the same, do we? What do you say?” She looked at Burjwok, “Please don’t say bytes.”
They giggled.

“Well…E-pain must come in color,” said Burjwok. She glanced at a bleary man she’s been analyzing. “You see that man in a suit?” she pointed at him with her eyes, “He’s feeling blue. He hasn’t been paid for ten months and he has no alternatives. He must have a family to take care of. Maybe even lost loved ones to this situation. His brother, his sister, his kid, his wife. And now he’s drinking to distance himself from reality. Why else would he be staggering alone at this time of the day? and who wears a suit in this weather?”

“That’s very substantial,” said Medi, “But you’d never really know.”

“You would,” said Burjwok. She swiftly reached into her bag and removed a small case. She opened it to reveal a pair of glasses resembling hers. “Pain lenses,” she said.

“What are pain lenses?” asked Medi, perplexed.

“You don’t know pain lenses?” Burjwok creased her face in pity.

“No.”

“You don’t know pain lenses?”

“No, BJ.”

“They’re pain lenses. Lenses for E- pain,” said Burjwok. Her tone was casual. It made Medi confused, and wonder what kind of Joke she’d be up to.

“Take it,” said Burjwok, “You just wear them, and boom! they’re yours.”

“I don’t know who falls for this,” said Medi, as she tucked the frames behind her ears.
But a few seconds later, Medi was falling for it. She removed and wore the glasses over and over again just to make sure what she saw was real. Instead of seeing people before her, she was seeing through them, like an x-ray. But the only thing that showed differently with glasses on, was a colored glow on their chests.

“That’s pain,” said Burjwok. Almost everyone’s chest was glowing. Some glowed red, green, blue, or pink. Some were also brighter than others. Only a few chests were unlit, and the staggering man in the suit had a bright blue glow. Medi gawked in astonishment. She’d never think of such science.

When it hit her, she looked at Burjwok’s chest. It wasn’t glowing, just like she expected. She smiled at BJ in admiration. Burjwok smiled back and continued with her scanning.

“What color is mine?” asked Medi.

“It’s pink. A dim pink.”

“What does pink mean?”

“I don’t know. You tell me.” Medi pouted. She bet Burjwok knew, but she didn’t want to talk about her E-pain.

“So, we’d know each other for this long, but you wouldn’t know about Pain lenses?” Burjwok deadpanned. “No wonder you’re rude.”

“Mschewww!” Medi Jeered.

“I’m kidding.”

“I know.”

They waited until it was dark enough to see nothing but the glowing chests. It was like the road was filled with colorful, floating LED lights. Medi didn’t know how to feel. The scene looked fabulous but none of these people actually felt happy.

“It’s getting late,” said Burjwok, as she stood up, “We should head back. I don’t even think I’ll get transport.”

“Just come and sleep at my place.”

“Noooo!” she said.

“Yessss!” Medi exclaimed, “you think you’ll reach home today?”

Burjwok narrowed her eyes at Medi. She thought for two seconds and then said, “It’s a mini sleepover then.”

They ended up sharing Medi’s bedroom for the night. Luckily, there were two beds, or Medi would’ve stayed up all night, trying to avoid Burjwok’s kicking. Medi wore her new frames and stared at the ceiling. It was painted white but she couldn’t point out the decorations in the dark.

“Shouldn’t these lenses work on objects too? Like the ceiling,” she said, “It must be feeling some sort of pain holding on to these walls. Our beds, the ground, chairs, and sofas. They must feel tired of us. Why can’t we see it?”

Burjwok yawned. She rolled over to face Medi who was still attentively observing the ceiling. “Maybe they’re not in pain. They’re touching, so probably they release each other’s pain when they’re connected. Perhaps the bed feels sadder when we’re not lying on it.”
Medi thought about it for a moment and said, “maybe.”

When she turned over, Burjwok was asleep, so Medi returned her gaze to the ceiling. Deep in thought and amazed by the concept of pain lenses, she decided to explore with Burjwok’s glasses. Shockingly, they were different. There was more intensity, and Medi detected a new glow from the corner of her eye. She turned excitedly to see which object’s glow would finally show. Maybe BJ’s lenses were stronger than hers. Maybe you needed to have no pain to see the pain in everything.
But it wasn’t the chair or table. It wasn’t even an object. It was Burjwok.

Burjwok’s chest was glowing, and it was a mixture of colors. Her light wasn’t as dim as the ones she’s seen earlier, it was much brighter. A light she never expected. It looked like a flame, blue at the bottom and slowly fading upwards in different colors. Burjwok was in pain. Deep pain. Or probably numb. Medi didn’t understand how BJ is able to bury it flawlessly. And the only way she would’ve ever seen it was through Burjwok’s own lenses. What would even cause her this much pain?

In the morning, they sat in Medi’s kitchen, drinking Madida. Burjwok seemed fresh as usual.
“The way you love Madida,” she snorted with a chuckle, “I know you’ll give its name to your child.”
But all Medi thought of was the buried light within. She wondered if BJ saw it when she looked in the mirror. She must’ve been the only one who was able to see it. Medi debated on bringing up the topic. How would she start? And if she did, would Burjwok even reply? BJ was good at ignoring when she wanted to. Especially with sensitive topics. But she shouldn’t ignore her best friend. She just wouldn’t. And if Medi kept quiet, she wouldn’t be saving her friend from her sorrows.

“I saw your pain last night,” she finally blurted.

Burjwok’s face stiffened in apprehension, and her eyes slightly widened in surprise. She looked invaded. She stared back at her porridge and kept quiet, long enough to let Medi look away and attend to hers, too. She’s been ignored.

“It’s not real,” Burjwok murmured.

“Don’t lie to me,” said Medi, her voice friendly. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Burjwok was clearly uncomfortable. She just continued to sip on her Madida.

“What’s hurting you this much?”

She insisted on her silence, but her eyes became watery and her breath seemed to hold for long. Medi went over to Burjwok and hugged her until she felt better. she aborted the questions. BJ will talk when she’s ready. But she never knew her friend. She wished Burjwok was open, she would’ve never judged her. She felt sad that this was the way she’d find out. Through something artificial. She wanted the lenses to be her real eyes.

And now, she reckoned her light might’ve turned blue. Her mind briefly shifted to the glowing people in Juba’s Park and imagined if they all had pain lenses. She wished they did. Maybe If they’re able to see each other’s hurt, they would comfort each other, and they wouldn’t be in continuous deep pain.

 

Author: Agyedh Papiti